Last night one of the most famous radio programs in the last
50 years ended. For those that don’t know, Loveline is a late night radio call
in program that uses a “call in” format. The call’s mostly centered around sex
questions that people were too shy to ask their friends or family about. It
started in 1983 with Dr. Drew on the now world famous KROQ out of L.A. Over the
years has been co-hosted by several notable DJ’s over the years including Riki
Rachtman, Psycho Mike, “Spacin” Scott Mason and Adam Carolla. After Carolla
joined the show went syndicated, reaching hundreds of markets. All of this in a
world that was still a bit wary of what the internet would be.
This isn’t about how Loveline became a powerhouse in the
radio industry, you can read all about that on Wikipedia. This is about how
this radio show changed me from a dumbass teenager into an adult. Let me get
one thing clear as we start this. This show was one of the single most
important things in my life for a long period of time. You may think “a radio
show being so important, that’s kinda sad” but the community surrounding the
show, the way that the hosts made you feel like they were talking just to you,
it made you feel special. It seamlessly blended laughing at some of the worst
things you can imagine and a level of sincerity that many shows lack these
days.
I first heard Loveline in 1997. I was 12 years old and I was
without a doubt in their demographic. A friend of mine at the time, Joe Allen,
had recorded a commercial for “Trojan Man!!” on a cassette and brought it in
for all of us to listen to. The commercial happened to also be in the middle of
Loveline. We listen to Adam Carolla talk about herpes before the commercial
started. It was funny, despite not really knowing why, but it was sex, anything
sexual, which to a 12 year old me was ultimately enticing. When listening to
the radio show when I was able, I would frequently stay over at a friend’s
house, David Morgan. We watched a lot of MTV, as one does when you are 12.
Loveline was on every day at 11pm. I would watch when I could, learning more
about how people react to sex, what most people don’t know about it the human
mind and how is reacts to abuse and trauma and ultimately how it can all be
funny.
I stopped watching when it ended in 2000. I stopped
listening around that time as well. I had found the internet in all of its
glory. High school had taken me out of the question phase and moved me into the
doing phase of life. In 2003 I graduated high school. Not having any real
direction in life I decided that I would get a job so I could move out of my parents’
house. I was hired as a security guard at the Bodega Harbor Golf Links, The
position was mostly overnight, but because of the heavy rotation of personal I
was normally on 8pm to 8am shifts. During my training with the late, great Joe
Craig he asked my “You ever listen to loveline?” I explained that I did when I
was younger, but had not for several years. For the next week of my training we
listened to it each night. When I was working solo at 10 pm it would be on in
my work truck. On days that I didn’t work I would listen to it at home. Shortly
after I got the job I helped my friend Alex Boyer get a job their too, we would
often listen to the show together or talk about it after if we were apart when
it aired. We both were huge fans.
The advice, the complaining by Adam Carolla, the games, the
humor, all of it spoke to me. This was a time in my life where I didn’t know
what I was doing. Working a shitty dead end job, living paycheck to paycheck in
the ghetto apartment that I was sharing with 2 other guys didn’t exactly make
me feel like I was on top of the world, but when Adam Carolla would talk about
where he was when he was 18, how unsuccessful he was it made my life more
bearable. His life mirrored mine and it gave me hope that maybe one day I would
be out of the poverty that I was living in.
The calls taught me about human psychology in a way that no
text book could. Dr. Drew had been doing the show for 20 years already and
Adam, being hyper vigilant, they would pick on small ticks, vocal tones and
words that people use to mask their true status. Things like the little girl
voice indicating early life trauma/abuse in women. The use of the term “right
now” when asking what people are doing with their lives, a term that brings
people self-comfort. EX:
“So what do you do for a living?”
“Right now I am getting high and looking for a job, but
something is right around the corner!”
It taught me what it means to be self-motivated and how the
only person that you have to blame for your issues is yourself. We all have
trauma no matter how big or small, it’s how you react to that trauma that
determines who you are as a person. Get help when you can’t do it yourself, get
therapy. Group therapy, talk to al-anon or AA or a friend, never suffer alone.
The most important thing that I learned is how to be an
adult. The difference between these kids that would often call in and how naive
they were. Despite being 20 years younger I always identified with Adam and
Drew and not the callers. I would nod when Adam would yell into the microphone
“Here’s an idea, get your “S” together and become a
functioning member of society”
“Stop screwing up your kids, you’re a parent, your kids come
first”
“Society has rules and breaking them is breaking what holds
us all together, just do what you are supposed to do”
When I heard that Loveline was ending I was not really surprised.
The rise of podcasts and the downfall of terrestrial radio has been ongoing for
years now. Frankly I don’t know how they lasted as long as they did. I saw last
week that yesterday (4/28/2016) would be the last ever show of Loveline,
co-hosted by Adam and Dr. Drew, just like old times. I told Alex and we made a
plan to sit and listen to it together. The show did not disappoint, lots of
names from the past showed up to give their two cents on how important the show
was to them and the industry as a whole. It was an appropriate ending to an
era.
I don’t know how else to say that this radio program helped
define me, so I will just say that if somehow someone who was attached to the
show in any capacity see’s this, thank you. Your hard work will life on in the
lives that you changed, some for the worse, but mostly for the better.
Thousands, maybe millions of people were affected by something that you had a
hand in. That is something to be immensely proud of.
I’ll leave you with this. After all of my ranting and reminiscing
about what it took for me to reach adulthood my favorite story from Loveline is
the following:
Best 6 minutes of your day, Tom Arnold is on the top of his
game and the whole thing is great. Watch it, you won’t regret it.
Finally echoing last night’s sign-off.
“For the last time, thank you and Mahalo”
